My friend, I don’t know if you need to hear this right now; but you are not a number. I’m talking about the one that shows up on the size tag in your clothes. This is so so important for me to share with you, because A LOT of mental energy, and our self worth, seems to be dictated by those tiny black numbers on a small piece of fabric, inside our clothes, that NOBODY else sees.
GIRL, WE DON’T PLAY IT SMALL
I know, the entire freaking world of fashion, social media and basically ALL THINGS, likes to shove it down our throats that style is for the tiny sizes; but I am here to tell you NOPE. This is a HUGE disservice to us women, and I’m here to teach you that fit matters waaaayyyyyyyy more than that stupid number on the tag.
When a woman looks her best, she is dressing herself, IN the moment, and loving it. Style is not something you need to put off for a time when you will be skinnier, nor is it something that is something you “used to do”. You are not a number.
IT’S A MENTAL GAME YOU CAN WIN
How we look at ourselves can go one of two ways. We are making progress in life, and we are proud of ourselves, or it’s never enough. Maybe it’s a great career move, training for that marathon, going after that goal of starting a business, or really nailing it on a healthy lifestyle. None of those things guarantee you to be smaller; but yet you surely will be proud of yourself.
You can be incredibly fit; but not a size 2. You can make amazing progress in health, wellness, career and relationships; but not be a size 2. And you can be completely happy, fulfilled, and feel ALL your worth, and not be a size 2. Want to know how I know? Because I know and admire women who are all those things, and NOT a size 2!
SHOPPING FEELS HARD WHEN YOU FOCUS ON THAT NUMBER
Here’s a super important tip I want you to really put in the memory vault. When you are shopping, you need to focus more on how and if a piece fits you properly, not if it’s a smaller size. Please, do this and I know you will find way more out there that works you. Remember, not all brands size their garments the same, not all designers use the same measurements to create a piece, and you can bypass all that stress of worrying if you fit into a smaller size; by focusing more on looking at how that piece actually works on your body.
So not only, are not all size 2’s made equal, when you shop for pieces that are XS, S, M, L, XL, etc, those definately aren’t either! When you have sizes that are not numbers, they are actually created to accommodate a larger group of people. In addition to that, fabric plays a huge role in how a piece fits. Of course those cute, vintage looking, and slouchy graphic T’s from Target fit you better than a thicker weave of cotton mix blend with more structure. They are TOTALLY different pieces meant to be worn two different ways. It’s also why a Medium one doesn’t feel like it fits quite the same in the other.
BIGGER IS BETTER
I encourage, and even challenge you, to not look at the size; but the literal fit of the garment next time you go shopping. And can I be honest friend? Nobody gives you a compliment and then asks what size that is! (And if they do, they have some issues to deal with, sheesh!) That tiny nagging voice in your head that tells you it’s crazy to want to wear this top if you have to go up one size to make sure it’s not only comfortable; but flattering, is keeping you from looking and feeling your best.
Why do we think that wearing a smaller size of something, when we know it doesn’t fit and needs constant tugging and pulling to stay in place, is a better look for us? Finding your Method to Style should also include you having a wardrobe that is effortless, yet intentional, and speaks to your personality and phase of life. Somedays are casual, some are dressy, some you just feeling “it” and want to dress the part! AWESOME! Your wardrobe should be able to accommodate all of those things.
IF IT’S TOO TIGHT, IT WON’T FLOW
One of the most flattering ways to wear your wardrobe, is when it skims across your lines, and flows when you walk. Slim fitting has it’s place. Body hugging, maybe once in a while. But you do not need to wear tight clothes to show off your curves. And more importantly, you want to be able to sit, stand, eat, drink and be merry, and feel like a million bucks while doing it!
When clothes are too tight, it looks as though we are filling out all the edges, and then reads as too small. When that happens, it actually works against us and can add more “visual weight” to your look, than if you had just worn something one size up. Worst case scenario, you go a size up and have a tailor adjust the hem, arm length or take it in at the sides to be more fitted.
We HAVE to buy clothes that fit the largest part of us first. So whether that is your bust, shoulders, hips or thighs, make sure the piece you want to buy takes care of those areas properly, the rest can be modified for a fraction of the price to give you a fantastic, almost custom fit you can feel really great about.
YOU ARE NOT A NUMBER
The time is now for you to move away from worrying about how often you can get into that smallest size ever. I mean, what does it matter if you have clothes in your closet that aren’t all the same size? Who actually cares if you sized up in your blouse to make sure you could close the buttons without them pulling apart and potentially showing off your bra. NOBODY. Besides, isn’t it worse to have ill fitting pieces that just aren’t quite right; but they are a small size. Let’s move past this.
You deserve to look and feel your best any, or every, day. Society, the fashion world, and pretty much every advertisement we see only shows one type of woman; but that’s not the average woman. Actually, far from it. So knowing that, I refuse to allow the tag on your clothes to dictate whether you feel worthy to have a beautiful wardrobe that speaks to your amazing personality, likes and style. And I’d love for you to embrace the same. Give this a try and you just might feel way more successful shopping when you start to focus on fit, not the size. You are not a number.